The warmth of spontaneous community visits

When my parents set up their first home in Tanzania, our home (like many other migrant/refugee homes) became a revolving door of family, friends and sometimes strangers who were either passing through or trying to find work. When we lived in Malaysia, a little boy my age (6) spent a few days with us while his parents sorted out travel documents. We had never met him or his family before. The community networks kicked in and provided the needed care and support in that moment. This continued when we moved to Sydney. Some guests stayed for months, others for a shared meal. I still don't know how my amma (and all the other ammas) managed the endless cycle of cooking and cleaning while working and raising us. My amma and appa are full of stories of those times! And my amma is never resentful of her extra duties! Back then, home visits were spontaneous. 'Visitors' would appear unannounced, or we would be the 'visitors' armed with Danish butter biscuits in that blue round tin! My appa was always dropping into Tamil activist homes for a feed at all hours. They share these stories of his visits with fondness and love. There was no need to schedule week-ahead WhatsApp rendezvous to ensure we weren't intruding; we just showed up, and there was always தேதண்ணி (tea) and often சாப்பாடு (food) on offer. Do I yearn for that informal rhythm of existing even if the nostalgia sometimes glosses over the exhausted ammahs and the mental stress of boundary-less relationships? Maybe. Maybe it would be slightly annoying if I was in the middle of my asana practice or was "hiding from humans" but more than anything maybe I should be thankful that someone took time out of their day to stop by to check in on me?! Surely. I'm grateful to Gobie mama and Khelen who still always pop in unannounced for a hug and with fresh coffee beans or some other artistic offering that Gobie is pursuing in that moment. (Gobie works with East Timorese villagers to make their own coffee blend) Despite all the challenges, these memories are truly special.